Addictions are one of the most challenging experiences one will have in life. It may be codependency in relationships, substances (like alcohol, cocaine, caffeine, tobacco and food). It may be an attachment to behaviours like gambling, sex, pornography, shopping or social media.
How do addictions manage to have so much power over us that we come to believe that they actually hold us in their grip until we either succumb to their power or finally surrender to something far greater than them in order to take back control? It is an inner fight, a battle of wills. Will-power is the only power that can contain and hold them under our control and not them over us. And different people will relate differently to that Higher Power – either the power of will within or the realisation of a power outside of us to help us. Many people who suffer with an addiction may be familiar with 12 Steps and the exploration of that Higher Power but clients I have worked with and my own experience suggests that the exploration of this power is only intellectual and not necessarily fully understood, realised and related to. This is just part of my approach with helping clients work this through and the key is the process of self-actualisation – the realisation and connection to our power within…
To really understand the power of will or a higher power one has to have a very close connection and relationship with it. It is key for both types to understand in order to overcome the addictive complex or the power of the addiction that utterly consumes and controls.
I have worked with many clients in the midst of their addictions and worked towards successful outcomes of overcoming that inner battle of wills – the will-power of the addiction over us and the will-power of our higher self, inner power or higher power within.
So many clients I have worked with have explored their past and it wasn’t the substance or behaviour they were under the control of that was the problem. It usually began as a social activity that was moderate and controlled. Or it was just something they did to feel part of the crowd. Their habit was not a problem, just social and relaxing, fun and harmless. It wasn’t until something else came along that the addiction grew and became a force to be reckoned with.
The key to addictions work is relationship: relationship with self, relationship with the will-power or higher power within and relationship with the world and people.
I use a multitude of approaches – physical, biological, mental, emotional, psyche-education, hypnotherapy techniques, creative visualisation, metaphor, somatic body work, meditation, affirmation, suggestion, play, creative expression.
The body is also another area of deep work – caring for the body again – diet, hydration, exercise, sunshine are all important to help the body heal after processing the toxins of addictions whether they are substances we put in our body or chemicals that flood our body from our hormones which in large doses are just as harmful as external substances. Healing the body is a gradual process but one that brings a much better feeling as it reaps the benefits of self-care.
Trauma therapy is a big component of addictions work as well. Early childhood attachment trauma is common – we may sometimes work on inner child, identifying needs not met and realising where we have grown into a far better way of being with our own children and people around us.
Guilt and shame is another process aspect of healing and much of the shame we carry is talked through and put into a deeper perspective of growth, learning and self-actualisation. Clients gradually free themselves of this guilt and shame because lessons can be learned and changes made. Time is a big healer here.
There is growth and healing after addiction…better ways of being, reconnecting with your self, people and the world…good things are coming to you…
It is an adventure and revelation of who you are, where you have come from and where you are going. Trust the process and realise where power really lies…within…
Contact me for a free one hour consultation to help you achieve your goals and needs in life:
martinhandy@protonmail.com
07864 029868
